Tag Archives: community associations

Meeting Tips #3 – O Say Can You Hear?

Community association boards do the bulk of their business at board meetings (or at least, they SHOULD). It can be tough for community members to observe the proceedings and resist the urge to chime in from the audience, especially on hot topics. This happens often with residents who do not understand that community associations are based on the representative democracy model. Yes, the board is ultimately responsible for picking the community center wallpaper…it’s not a community vote…

Wise boards do everything they can to avoid operating in a vacuum. They know they are responsible for making decisions that benefit the membership as a whole. They also learn that group leadership is a messy business. The odds are less than great that everyone will be happy with every decision. Convincing a vocal minority that they have been heard can be tough.

Meetings are an opportunity to build community through listening. Sometimes the format of board meetings can create unintentional landmines in this regard. Here are a few ways to flip the script and make opportunity.

Owner Comment Period

Many state statutes require a period of time be set aside for owners to ask questions and make comments. Even if it might not be required in your location, it’s a terrific provision. There are a few nuances to how a board administrates the comment period that will take full advantage of listening opportunities.

  • Timing: Some communities choose to have a comment period on the agenda before action items to allow for input. Others find that most of the comments and questions are on topics unrelated to the action items and find it more beneficial to put comment periods later in the agenda. I had one client that found it most effective to have two short open forums: the first for input before the board discussed action items, and the second one after, to allow members to bring up items unrelated to action items.
The key is to thoughtfully consider how members can best contribute to the discussion and be heard. Remember – you never know where the next great idea might come from! Be ready to hear it.
  • Following up: A typical refrain from some community association members is that things are discussed at meetings but nothing ever happens. Sometimes the culprit is how the owner comment period is conducted. Some matters are simple management issues that can be addressed on the spot. However, boards are wise not to make decisions on new issues brought up in open forum when they are unprepared. Some boards use the stock phrase, “We will take that under advisement,” but they don’t actually have a system to close the loop. Here are a few tips to help boards listen, which will also give their community members the confidence they actually are:
  1. Take notes while the member is talking to capture the main points.
  2. Ask questions for clarification as needed,
  3. Restate. A great phrase I’ve used is, “So I think I heard…”
  4. Embrace passion. If an owner is upset, they care. There’s energy there. Perhaps there’s an ad hoc committee lurking, just waiting to be formed, that will help the board turn a problem into a solution.
  5. If a matter is worth discussion, add it to new business in the meeting agenda.
  6. Make it clear if a matter is delegated to management, a committee, or a board member.  Who has the ball?
  7. If a matter would require an unbudgeted expense, you can indicate that it might be included in next year’s budget discussion and direct that it be added to the budget file. Just make sure it’s included in the first draft, (a.k.a. “the kitchen sink version” – for more on that concept, CLICK HERE) of the budget, no matter how wacky the idea might seem.
  8. Make sure the manager or another party is responsible for producing a meeting task list. The list should include not only the follow-up items from motions, but also all the little details noted above that would get lost otherwise.
Hint: If owners are using valuable meeting time to bring up day-to-day management issues, it may be a sign your processes are not clear. Asking a member if they have reported the matter to management is an appropriate response. If they have, but believe the response was inadequate, you can let them know you appreciate the report and will help to connect the dots between the owner and management. If they have not, it’s a golden opportunity. Listen to the report, then let them know management will take care of it. Then remind them that in the future, they need not wait for board meetings to make requests. That message reinforces the association’s service procedures and helps all participants understand the best way to be heard in such matters.

Recognition

Don’t forget to thank volunteers and managers for their efforts. Thank members for their comments. Recognize good questions. If a member discussed a problem, show empathy for the member even if they were a part of the problem. Practicing recognition promotes active listening and demonstrates the emotional intelligence that helps members know they have been heard.

Hot Topics

Some disagree with me, but I’ve always recommended that those chairing meetings open the floor for specific comments on particularly contentious issues to allow members to express themselves. This uncommon action of adding impromptu comment periods proves the board is serious about member input. You can still set a time limit to keep things going. You can also request that if someone else had already made a point a member wishes to make, that they make a simple statement of agreement and do not make repetitive points.

Is This the Right Meeting?

Board meetings are designed to conduct business. If the member comment period is taking over the meeting, the community is telling you something. You have bigger issues to address. When board meetings become free-for-alls, it has become a de facto “town hall” meeting. It also may be telling you the community is deep in the weeds and needs to take a step back and do some serious planning. Board meetings are great for doing the basic business of the community. But they are lousy for town hall meetings and for strategic planning.

Town hall meetings are great for either collecting or disseminating information. No business is done, just communication. It amazes me that most community associations never have a yearly planning session soon after annual meetings to discuss the goals for the upcoming board year. If the community needs to hire an outside facilitator to help plan and conduct town hall or strategic planning meetings, it can be well worth the investment.

Carpe Momentum

Meetings are opportunities to lead, to connect, and to build community. Listening is at the heart of all three. Why not seize the moment?

Meeting Tips #2 – Prepare TO Die? Or is it Prepare OR Die? Same thing!

Classic line from “The Princess Bride”

The Five Ps

Proper preparation prevents poor performance. Think about meetings of any type you’ve attended where the participants were well prepared. Quality discussion, good decisions, the right balance of thorough and efficient, right?

Board members are fiduciaries. They have been entrusted with taking care of association members’ assets. Their decisions can make a difference in the quality of life for everyone who lives in the community. Meetings are where decisions are made. Good performance is important. Preparation is crucial.

Are You Prepared?

Signs your board may need to focus on meeting preparation:
• “That’s covered in your Board package”
• “I’m not ready to make a decision”
• The sound of a board member ripping open his board package upon sitting down at the table.
• “Did we get that (report, proposal, memo, etc.)?”
• Endless discussion on details, possibly involving eye rolls, facepalms, and other frustrated non-verbal communication
• Pattern of last-minute additions to the meeting agenda
• Asking the same questions that were answered last month

End result: Death by meeting.

Two Sides of Preparation

Like so many other situations in community associations this can be a system issue, a performance issue, or a combination of the two. Be clear on the real problem.

System: Are those responsible for providing information in advance of the board meeting (managers, board members, committees) providing adequate data for the board to make informed decisions? Does the packaging of the information work for the participants (electronic or hard copy, visuals, analysis, the organization of data, etc.)? Does the established schedule for board package delivery give participants sufficient time to thoroughly review it?

Performance: Do participants read the board package? Are the packages delivered on time? Do the packages answer questions or raise them?

Preparation Tips

Board Members: One of the primary duties of board members is to read. If you need more time, make sure the expectation is clear. If the data does not speak to you, share how you’d like it to be presented. If you have questions about a subject, ask about it before the meeting. Make sure committee members and others who contribute to the board package are aware of the schedule for meetings and package delivery.

Managers: Board packages are your opportunity to help the board do its job and to gain respect as a professional. A bunch of proposals and memos attached to an agenda is not how a professional prepares a board package. Never throw data at your client. Review, analyze, frame, and explain. Review information with a critical eye with your client in mind, anticipate the questions they will ask and provide the answers in the package. Present information in a way that speaks to your specific client. Ask if the board needs their packages sooner.

Don’t Be Inigo’s Victim

You didn’t kill his dad. You don’t have to prepare to die.   But you do need to prepare.  Remember the “Five Ps” and escape death by meeting.  Together, managers, committee members, and boards can create and execute a system that helps everyone to efficiently and sufficiently prepare and do great work in the service of their communities.

Not Your Father’s Agenda – Meeting Tips #1

The difference between a productive one-hour meeting and a mind-numbing, four-hour marathon can sometimes be the formatting of the agenda.

Roadmaps help you to get to your destination and get there on time. Your meeting agenda can do the same thing. A few years ago, some co-conspirators and I put on a mock board meeting at a CAI local chapter conference to illustrate the wrong way to conduct a meeting. Here was our agenda (click on the image to enlarge):

Clearly, we used a bit of hyperbole to call out plenty of dysfunction on the Gates of Hell board. There are plenty of nuances (and some not too subtle points) to pick apart. There are two features of this agenda to consider that are commonly used in community associations: (1) the order of business and (2) a missing element. Both can make a big difference.

Prioritize the Important Stuff

The Gates of Hell agenda follows a typical order of business. It does a good job of keeping topics organized, but it can have an unintended consequence. The decision items are the most important things the board will do. Those decisions will have the biggest impact on the quality of life in the community and frequently its financial health. Most board meetings are held in the evenings, with decision items often listed at the end. How fresh and mentally sharp are you at 7PM? And if that’s the start of the meeting, by the time you get to new business, you might be toast. If it’s a marathon meeting, you might be making a six-figure contract approval decision at 10 o’clock at night. How clear-headed will your thinking be while making a decision that will impact the whole community?

The solution? Re-order the agenda. Put action items in as early as possible, before all the reports. Make decisions when you are at your sharpest, not when you might be tempted to get a vote over with as fast as possible because you are tired and cranky.

The Missing Element – A Timed Agenda

A timed agenda can also make a world of difference. If each agenda item is timed, it gives the group a target. It gives the chair a tool to help move the meeting along. Other board members can support that chair by referencing where you are as compared to the agenda. Don’t be a dictator and cut off discussion or reports citing the timing on the agenda. It’s most effective as a gentle nudge and reminder. Simple but effective.

There may be a benefit in taking a hard look at your starting time. I’ve had some clients that intentionally scheduled meetings to start before members have the opportunity to get dinner. Another client Intentionally scheduled their meetings early on Seinfeld night because it motivated them to be efficient. Both of these strategies worked but required board members to be disciplined in another area – preparation. 

Let the Data Drive the Discussion

Change is hard.  New is hard.  Fear makes bad news hard to take.  Is it any wonder that from time to time community association managers, advisors and volunteer leaders find themselves at odds with community members or each other?  Sooner or later, they all will find themselves duty bound to share a message someone won’t want to hear.

Money Hurts

This happens a lot when money is involved.  People hate to spend money especially when they cannot see the value of the expense.  Here’s where community associations remind members of the government, either consciously or subconsciously.  I recall hearing a quote from the Wall Street Journal along the lines of, “People have the same warm emotional connection to their homeowners association as they do the Internal Revenue Service.”  Ouch!

Drill down a little and it makes sense.  Citizens expect infrastructure and services, but they may chafe at paying the taxes that make them possible.  Why?  In a word, trust.  Governments, with their inevitable bureaucracies, have complicated, enormous budgets that the average citizen cannot comprehend.  This makes it difficult, if not impossible, to tell how well utilized those taxes are.  The end result?  Distrust and an assumption of waste…or worse.  Association Fees are a community association’s tax.  If members are not clear that their money is being spent wisely, it’s tough to take.  Members may well default to their assumptions of waste…or worse.

See The Enemy

If you are going to ask for higher fees, spend a wad of cash, or change anything people are familiar with, you need to be ready to explain why.  You may need to combat distrust.  Fortunately, this is much easier to accomplish on the micro level of a community association than is it for the Federal Government!  The information might be somewhat complicated, but it can be available and explainable.

If the direction is sound, it’s based on sound data.  But members may not be aware of the data they need to trust the messenger.  And until the messenger is trusted, the message is lost.

There are two insidious enemies that can erode the trust of your members:

  1. The Law of Omitted Data: The concept is that if a person has some knowledge about a subject but does not have all the facts, it is likely that person’s degree of misunderstanding will grow exponentially over time.  The impact of the law can be devastating in the group dynamic, especially when the Telephone Game factor gets added to the mix.  I’ve seen this blow communities apart.
  1. Theoryworld: The absence of experience or real life information doesn’t stop people from trying to be experts. We imagine scenarios and responses and all kinds of possible permutations and combinations of things that might happen.  Discussion and arguments in Theoryworld last for-EV-er!  They have an annoying tendency to bear little resemblance to reality and waste valuable time and energy.  Theoryworld is exhausting and leads to regrettable decisions.

When data is bad or missing, misinformed opinions and fear can set in and emotions can run high.  It gets personal.  People mistakenly see each other as the enemy.  The real enemies, the Law of Omitted Data and Theoryworld, are hiding just under the surface.

How can you vanquish these enemies?  How can you fill in the blanks and bridge the gap between theory and reality?  How can your group make good decisions and actually get things done?

Fight the Real Enemies

Your first reaction to manifestations of the Law of Omitted Data or Theoryworld may be to correct or defend.  Don’t.  That adds fuel to the ego-driven fire, even if you are 100% right.  Rather than counteracting bad data, seek to fill in the gaps of understanding with good data.  Your goal isn’t to win an argument.  Ego is a major part of the problem.  Elevate the dialogue from ego-based to principle-based– from emotional opinion-based to fact-based.  In so doing, you create a space in which the data can drive the discussion.

The presentation of the data requires more than logic.  It means acknowledging ego and emotion, both yours and others’.  This is another real life scenario where gobs of emotional intelligence will make a massive difference.   Here are a few strategies to get there:

  • Find trustable outside experts. A message from a disinterested third-party can have an impact.  Share their information or let them do the talking.
  • Show and tell. A picture really does paint a thousand words.  And seeing it up close and personal makes things real.  Cruddy pipes, scary boiler rooms, a mudslide behind the pool.  You don’t have to sell it.  Just allow people to see reality.
  • Show your work like doing arithmetic in the third grade. Even if the level of detail seems excessive, the fact that the research was done and you are willing to show your process can build bridges and confidence.
  • Conversely, make it clear the presentation of detailed data isn’t a snow job. Bullet point summaries, charts and graphs– anything that aids visualization is good.  The supporting materials can be in the back.
  • Accept all options and ideas at first, even if every bone in your body tells you they never work. Instead of saying “no” up front, let the group decision making process say “no.”
  • Try to use more questions than declarative statements

Hail Victory!

Don’t worry about making a case.  Create a space where the case makes itself.  Trust the process.  Be patient – time will tell the truth.  Let the data drive the discussion.

What strategies have you used to defeat the Law of Omitted Data and Theoryworld?

O Say Can You See?

“Tom, aren’t there any good management companies out there?”

That was the question posed to me by a condominium association board member circa 1988. I was in my formative years in the management business. That client knew me in my first incarnation of self-employment. I had completed a very successful plastering and painting project. I had only begun to venture into part-time, on-site management services the year before. That one question helped me to crystallize an Aha! Concept. Let me explain.

The Devil’s In The Details

I really enjoyed working with this group, even though they were rather “high maintenance.” They were enthusiastic, dedicated, and genuinely nice folks. They had an older building, the logistics of which amplified the inequity of scale faced by most small associations. They had a central HVAC plant to serve less than 30 units. The units were large and spread through only four stories, so even the cost per unit for roof maintenance and eventual replacement was much higher than most buildings.

There were other factors that added to this condominium’s challenges. Most units were owner-occupied. There was a seven person board, and there were several active committees. In a way, this was the perfect condominium – it seemed like every unit owner was involved! But this led to an unintentional consequence. At only 20+ units, they didn’t seem to justify much of an on-site maintenance or management presence. All that active participation meant that volunteers were in the details of every facet of the operation, which led to innumerable questions and a desire for fast and detailed response. Off-site “cost-effective” management and engineering services were always going to be reactive. This group was never going to be satisfied with the status quo. I knew a little about the history of that condominium, and knew they had already fired most of the companies I would have recommended at the time.

The Aha! Concept – System or Performance?

I’ll always remember this client because it helped me to formulate a frame of reference that became a core issue for much of my consulting work ever since. I noticed that most boards defaulted to a common position when something was wrong. They tended to conclude that they were getting lousy results because somebody wasn’t doing their job. This was one of the first clients to help me realize that you have to figure out if you’ve got a system problem, a performance problem, or a combination of the two. Until you figure that out, you are always answering the wrong question. It is unlikely you will get the results you seek. My 1988 client needed to find a way to get more proactive attention (and pay more), or lower their expectations. Status quo approaches were never going to give them what they wanted.

It’s Not Easy

It can be tough for volunteers serving on a board to see things clearly to determine the root of their dissatisfaction. There are a myriad of potential reasons why.

  • It’s not their full-time job. They may lack the time or expertise needed to accurately diagnose the situation.
  • They may be too close to the situation to see it clearly.
  • They may have been fortunate to have had an excellent manager or other service providers who regularly exceeded the specifications of their agreements. Great performance can mask a deficient system. God help the next good, but not great, manager…
  • They may be resistant to the idea that it might cost a little more to get what they need, exacerbated by a market flooded by management companies inclined to over promise and roll the dice.
  • They may not recognize that all associations have life cycles. The systems that met yesterday’s expectations may not be able to handle today’s realities, much less tomorrow’s. Of if only I had a dime for every time I heard “Well we’ve done just fine with x for the last ten years, we shouldn’t need it now.”
  • There may not be many free thinkers out there prepared to offer creative solutions, or companies geared up to offer those customized services, especially to a smaller association.

Fresh Eyeballs

It may be time to take a fresh look. Seek out and listen to innovative ideas. Take advantage of opportunities to network with other volunteer leaders. See if your city, county or state facilitates programs for board members. The Community Associations Institute is an excellent resource for any community association. CAI Press includes a hugely diverse library of material. Professionals in the field and volunteers contribute articles and educational seminars through CAI National and local chapters. An underutilized feature of CAI membership for volunteers is the networking aspect that is available through participation in local and national programs

If nothing seems to be working, don’t give up or settle. Maybe most importantly…don’t assume. Dig a little deeper. Look a little harder. You might just find what you really need.

14 Things Your Reserve Analysts Might Not Tell You – And It’s Not Their Fault (Part 1)

Reserve studies are invaluable tools for condominiums, cooperatives, and homeowners associations. Used properly, they assist boards and managers to make good decisions for reserve funding with long range planning in view. They also help to plan for near term capital projects. The reserve study provides a basis for a systematic and disciplined approach to reserve funding and capital project planning.

At the same time, I’ve heard too many complaints from clients through the years about accuracy of the data included in their reserve studies. This tends to occur when unpleasant and unplanned realities throw a monkey wrench into the best laid plans. I’ve found that either an unrealistic expectation or a poor understanding of the study process are typically at the root of the issue. This series of 3 blogs helps to address the first issue. I’ll provide tips on how to work with your reserve analyst in another blog soon.

What a Reserve Study Is…And Isn’t

Professional reserve studies have two components – a physical analysis and a financial analysis of major property components. The physical analysis helps to estimate the remaining useful life. The financial analysis turns it all into an actionable plan to recommend a funding level that ensures the Association will have enough money in the bank to replace components when needed. For more details, you can review CAI’s National Reserve Study Standards (2023 update), and the Association of Professional Reserve Analysts Standards of Practice.

Reserve studies are relatively inexpensive as compared to other engineering analyses. There are reasons for that.

  • Reserve analysts are by definition generalists engaged for the specific purpose of creating an overall financial plan. They do not undertake the detailed condition reports, basis for design, or specifications that a specialty engineer may create in preparation for a particular capital project.
  • Reserve studies do not include destructive testing. No walls will be opened, ground dug up, or other means to get into the details of conditions unseen.
  • Reserve analysts are neither omniscient nor clairvoyant, nor do they possess X-ray vision. You’d have to pay a lot more for that!

Throw Me A Bone, Man!

The good news is reserve analysts LOVE data. The more valuable information you can give them, the more they will plug into the study. The better the study, the better your plan.

Here are a few nuggets you should consider feeding to your reserve analyst. Complicated condominiums and cooperatives, especially high rises, are more likely than HOAs to benefit from the additional data points listed in this blog series. Regardless, it’s worth taking the time to consider whether each of the 14 nuggets factor into your association’s reserve plan. I can tell you they’ve either saved my clients a lot of heartburn, or I learned about them because of my clients’ heartburn!

These first 5 nuggets deal largely with building components. The next 2 blogs will address discretional expenses, practical project planning, and approaches to thorny cash flow issues.

  1. Engineering Studies for Stuff You Can’t See: This could apply to components like waterproofing systems under patios, parking lots, green space, fountains, etc. Without doing destructive testing and taking a look at what is underneath, you may have no idea how much it will cost to design and replace a system you can’t see. You will likely pay far more for this engineering study than you will for the reserve study, but it will be well worth it. One client’s reserve study had estimated system replacement for four garages to be $500K. When it was all said and done they paid about $1.1M…. per garage! The information gleaned from their engineer’s work helped them to prioritize and pay for the project. If they had that information up front and included in their reserve study they could have avoided sticker shock.
  2. Elements Impacted by Code Compliance: The typical reserve study assumes like-for-like replacement. However, local code may require a building to upgrade an old system to meet current codes, exponentially increasing the cost of some projects. This is particularly true of fire protection systems and elevators. I worked with a client whose reserve study assumed they could replace their 1965 fire panel and annunciator for about $80,000. The problem was that per code, replacing the panel required them to bring the entire system up to code. The final price tag exceeded $1,000,000! Getting cost projections from sources familiar with local codes can save you from ugly surprises.
  3. Piping Systems: No pipe will live forever. Yet, I have seen common piping systems omitted from reserve studies for whatever reason. Also, determining the remaining useful life of copper piping is easier than ever before thanks to non-invasive technology. Obtaining a pipe condition study for domestic, HVAC and waste piping can provide invaluable data.
  4. New Construction Technology: Sometimes new building products or construction techniques can post a challenge until there is a track record of periodic major maintenance, rehabilitation or replacement. Installing contractors, architects or engineers involved in the new construction can sometimes provide some insights to help plan for future projects.
  5. Underground Piping and Wiring: This can be a big one for garden communities, especially those built in the 1960s as apartments, and particularly those with central HVAC plants. I don’t always see underground electrical feeds, HVAC piping, or domestic water piping in reserve studies for communities that have these components. Tracing a break or a leak, digging up between buildings to replace a section of wiring or piping and restoring the grounds on an emergency basis is an expensive proposition. It is surprising how much electrical wiring has been laid in the ground without being run through conduit. This can even impact the planning for replacement of light poles. Identify the risk and make a plan to include in the reserve study as needed.

Hard Reality

In some cases, the engineering and design costs outlined in the 5 nuggets above might exceed the cost of your reserve study. But that’s irrelevant. Think about the impact of not having the data. Underfunding by any means is a bad strategy.

When & Who?

In the third and final blog in this series, we’ll identify potential resources and factors that will help the Board to decide when to reach out.

Next…

In next week’s blog, we will discuss data points related to practical considerations when planning for projects. I will again reach back into my bag of experience to find the things that made a huge difference for my clients through the years.

So You Think You Are a Good Listener and Other Delusions

In his outstanding book The Excellence Dividend, Tom Peters states that listening is, among other things, “the heart and soul of engagement and thoughtfulness,” “the basis for collaboration and partnership and community,” “the linchpin of memorable service” and “the bedrock that underpins a commitment to EXCELLENCE.”

We know listening is important. Yet, studies show that we are not as good at it as we think we are. Fortunately, it is a learnable skill. It is an area in which we can always improve. There are lots of resources available to help us focus on the art of “active listening.” Strategies include:

  • Pay Attention: Use your eyes along with your ears. Look at someone intently enough long enough to determine eye color. What do their body language and facial expressions tell you? What are they NOT saying?
  • Acknowledge: People with problems typically want two things in this order: (1) To be heard (2) To get a solution. Until someone is confident you hear them, you have zero basis for dialogue. Give them all the cues you can to show you are engaged. Open your stance, nod, smile. Use verbal cues like my favorite, “Oh wow!” Let ‘em talk. Empathize.
  • Clarify: Ask questions. Then ask more questions. Get the whole picture. Repeat statements back and summarize. I am partial to the phrase “I think what I heard was…” This gives the other person permission to correct you if your understanding requires adjustment.
  • Ignore Your Biases: We are all biased. We all make assumptions. We all listen through the filters of our experience. You might think you are completely objective, but you’re not. Nobody is. Recognize your biases and assumptions and do your best to get past them.
  • Suspend Judgment: It’s easy to impute motives, especially if you have a history with someone. But even if you are correct, there is no value in thinking about them. Acknowledging others’ emotions does not mean judging the validity or even the appropriateness of those emotions. Do your best to focus on facts.
  • Take Notes: Careful note taking keeps you tuned in. It dignifies the other person. It’s a great tool for the open forum part of Board meetings.

Why Are We Lousy Listeners?

You might think you are a good listener. More than likely you are deluded. Even if you ARE right, you’ll still need to work on it. There are many obstacles to being a good listener. Be aware of them and work to overcome them.

  • Did I mention we are all biased and make assumptions? Imperfect humans are subjective by nature.
  • We focus on us, not the other person. Instead of fully listening, we are formulating our brilliant response, thinking about how wrong or annoying the other person is, or feeling rushed or stressed.
  • We may be “18 second interrupters”.  Peters cites research that indicates an average doctor will interrupt the patient presenting her symptoms after 18 seconds. The habit is not unique to doctors. Yikes.
  • Distractions…Oooo look – a squirrel!
  • Electronics: A disproportionate number of the problems people have asked me to fix in recent years originated with electronic communication issues. Some conversations need to be offline. Listening with only your eyes has its limitations. If a conversation starts to go sideways, pick up the phone. Or better, go face to face. If you’ve grown up communicating mostly through an electronic device, you’ll need to learn to use the full range of human abilities to be a good listener.
  • The big one… missing the bigger picture. Employing active listening strategies does not guarantee success.

It’s More Than Listening

Listening is part of something bigger. You can employ all the active listening strategies and still be ineffective. Your IQ can help you to learn the techniques, but your EQ, or emotional intelligence, will be the key to being a good listener and effective communicator.

If you are not genuinely interested in other people, in solving problems, and in making a difference, you are likely not listening well and people can smell it. It really does start with you. And people don’t always make it easy! I’ve often thought that a key to success is the ability to be respectful of others when their attitudes, words or actions are not what we would classify as respectable. Just remember, being empathetic with others doesn’t mean you have to agree with them. It does mean you have to listen hard enough to imagine what it might be like to be in their shoes. That can require a very high level of emotional intelligence.

Final Words

“The best way to persuade someone is with your ears, by listening to them.” – Dean Rusk

More gems from The Excellence Dividend – some of the “Good Listener Rules.”  (Buy the book. Seriously.):
• A good listener does not EVER take a call, even from her or his boss.
• A good listener takes EXTENSIVE notes.
• A good listener CALLS (better than e-mails d%#n it) a couple of hours later to thank the other for his or her time.
• A good listener the next day with a couple of follow-up queries.
• A good listener does NOT pontificate!

“Never miss a good chance to shut up.” – Will Rogers

We Are All Geniuses…or Insane. Your Call!

I’ve heard this quote, widely attributed to Albert Einstein, for a long time. As it turns out, he may or may not have ever said it. Thing is, it resonates so well that it’s easy to attach genius to the observation. So why not Einstein?

We silly humans tend to choose familiarity over change, even if it makes us miserable. I’ve noticed it in my world of community association boards and managers. Instead of taking an honest look at our results and trying to figure out how we got there, we’ll practice what Canadian brand transformation specialist Alan Quarry calls “glue diligence.” We do it because we’ve always done it that way, and dang it, we’ll never change!

…And then we blame everybody and everything else for our frustrations and failures…

One of the most important changes we can make is to see ourselves differently. For the longest time, the thought of being a salesperson made me cringe, just a little bit. But a few years ago, I realized sales and marketing were weak areas in my business skillset. It was time to hit the books. Funny thing is, a few of the writers I learned from in my study of leadership through the years started off as sales guys.

THE ART OF LEADERSHIP AND SALES

I didn’t fully connect the dots until I read Daniel Pink’s brilliant book To Sell is Human. It finally hit me. I gave myself permission to see myself and my role a little differently. The art of leadership is the process of helping people move from one place to another. Outstanding leaders share a vision so compellingly, people buy in because they see the benefit. Yes…BUY IN. Therefore, leaders sell and it’s a good thing.

Sales done right has never been ugly. Great salespeople believe they have something of value to sell, provide service and value first, and create a space where people can see themselves taking advantage of the value proposition. They are not selfishly manipulative. They are connecting dots. In essence, they don’t sell anything but an idea, creating a space for others to buy. They understand the wisdom of Jeffery Gitomer’s words, “Nobody likes to be sold, but everybody likes to buy.”

THE SUPERPOWER

The process of sales is the process of leadership. If we are to lead, we must sell. And to be truly effective, we need the superpower all great leaders and salespeople have – the ability to be an agent of change. This is leadership at its highest level – the ability to lead change, sensing when and how to initiate, support or facilitate it so that the stakeholders in an organization make it their own.

And yet, how many board members and community managers see themselves as leaders, salespeople and change agents?

WHAT WE HAVE HERE IS….A FAILURE TO COMMUNICATE

So many times it comes down to communications skills. We all have a tendency to communicate from our standpoint. Managers are trained to be technically proficient. Board members may be trained in governance. Unfortunately, as a result both are frequently ineffective. They are “doing their jobs” while missing the point. It has led to community association members disconnecting from their communities. Quoting from memory a comment from the Wall Street Journal, “People tend to have the same emotional connection to their HOAs as they do the Internal Revenue Service.” Ouch. It doesn’t have to be that way.

Think about how the message is received and you might realize you are coming off like Moses descending the mountain with stone tablets from God. Our message may be important, but it’s not THAT important. Worse, we may be accidently sending the message that people exist for the governing documents, when the truth is that those documents exist for the people. Or you may be coming off like a mean nun with a ruler, ready to whack all those disobedient children.

It doesn’t matter what you say. It only matters what is heard. And while you can never control what’s heard, you really need to think about the message and work your brains out to communicate from the receiver’s perspective, not your own. That’s what great leaders, salespeople, and change agents do. Make it real. Show the value. Explain the Why. And be patient. Because until you do these things, you’re just part of the increasing noise in your members’ lives.

INSANITY OR GENIUS?

If you are not connecting with your community or your client, if you are frustrated, it may be time to stop the insanity. Make a change. Start with how you see your role. Be leaders. Be sales people. Be change agents. Communicate like the best leaders and salespeople with the change agent superpowers.

Change the message and the delivery so it actually reaches your audience. It’s about them, not you. Make it real. Show value. Be a genius!

Thanks to Ed Loonam, PCAM, of Property Management Associates in Virginia Beach, Virginia, who gave me the inspiration to turn my SEVA-CAI CA Day sparks talk into a blog post!

Dear Boards: Suck It Up and Be Transparent

James Dyson developed over 5,000 prototype designs for his revolutionary vacuum cleaner between 1979 and 1984. Nobody cared until 1983. An Italian appliance maker agreed to sell them by mail order. It was not exactly a success; only about 500 units were sold that year.

But Dyson was undeterred. He never forgot his unhappy experience with a typical vacuum in 1974, when he noticed it seemed to lose suction easily and required a lot of maintenance to maintain optimal performance. He knew there had to be a better way. He was sure his “cyclonic separation” technology was the answer.

Who Wants to See Dirt?

One of the key features of the vacuum was its clear plastic dirt collector. Market research at the time said people would hate it. But Dyson sensed that people would want to see the results of the vacuum’s performance, no matter how ugly it might be. So in 1991 he launched Dyson Appliances Unlimited. Was he right? Today Dyson is a multi-billion pound (British) company employing over 8,500 people. But you don’t need to know statistics to see his impact. Take a look at the appliance shelf at your local department store or Amazon page. How many competitors copied him?

Historically, vacuum cleaners trapped dirt in a hidden bag that was removed and thrown away. The clear dirt collector went against the grain of conventional wisdom at the time. In his ebook Who Do You Want Your Customers to Become?, Michael Schrage quoted Dyson: “The interesting thing is that when I did this, all of our competitors just fell about the floor laughing; they were actually delighted that I’d been so stupid. And the retailers wouldn’t have it . . . We went into the stores, and our vacuum has all this (expletive deleted) in it. The retailers are absolutely hostile. They say, ‘No, no, no, it’s a complete mistake—make it smoked or tinted or something.’ But I persisted, because I found it really fascinating that you could see exactly what was happening; you could actually see the nature and texture and type of dirt you’ve picked up.”

Schrage concluded, “While Dyson’s transparency defied the industry’s conventional wisdom, customers knew they could see with their own eyes how well their innovative technology worked. Dyson offered a simple, easy, and inexpensive user experience that invited customer confidence….Transparency creates trust. Dyson’s contrarian innovation was an investment in trust. Dyson empowered his customers to come to their own real-time conclusions about his product’s performance. “

What’s This Got to Do with Community Association Governance?

Too many boards of directors of community association are nervous. Nervous about contention. Nervous about bad PR. Nervous about looking unprepared. Nervous about being wrong. Reflexively, they retreat into secrecy, even when state or local statutes require open meetings.

I get it. People can be tough. Most communities have hard cases living in them. I remember Elvira, a unit owner in a particularly contentious condominium I once managed. She was the Board’s harshest critic, never missing an opportunity to call out any and every imperfection. When I asked her why she didn’t step up and serve on the Board, it became clear she didn’t want to be accountable. She just enjoyed holding others accountable.

I also remember my first condo management job. I was a contracted, interim building manager for a small and elite condominium in Washington DC. I went to work every day with a knot in my stomach, certain I would blow the building up. At the end of my tenure, the whole community threw me a going away party. It was amazing. I cornered one of the board members and said, “I don’t understand. This was my first management job. I made plenty of mistakes. Why were you so happy with me?” I’ll never forget the answer.

“Tom, you told us about every little thing that went wrong. We knew if anything really bad happened you would be honest about it. You have no idea how valuable that was to us to have a manager we could trust.”

“Transparency creates trust”
– Michael Schrage

Humility and openness are invaluable. They set a tone and can change the game. My mentor Arthur Dubin, President of Zalco Realty, and I still recall a president of a condominium we helped turn around back in the day. The condominium had been the victim of paralysis by analysis. This was due in no small part to egos that got in the way of seeing reality and being responsible for decisions that might not work. A brilliant oncologist, this president was always willing to admit when he didn’t understand something. He asked the questions others were afraid to. His standard line was, “talk to me like I’m 5 years old.” The board became more comfortable discussing matters openly and sharing information on topics in progress with owners. All their dirt was in the open. Nobody got sued, the community came together, and stuff got done. More than 20 years later, Arthur and I still reminisce about “Dr. Bob” moments every so often.

Consumers pay good money for a vacuum and want to see the results. They trust their money was well spent, even if what they see might be a bit distasteful. They know the technology works. Seeing the results allows them to draw their own conclusions. Community members pay their fees. They want to have confidence that the organization they are funding is working well. They want to have confidence in the process, even when the news is a less than pleasant. Seeing the process unfold allows members to buy in for themselves.

So your gut reaction may be to stay “safe” in the shadows. This is a fear-based decision. You already know those don’t work out too well (FEAR = False Evidence Appearing Real). You may make assumptions about how members will react to seeing the dirt. And it’s true that in our litigious society there are reasons to be discrete. But knowledge gaps will be filled by the rumor mill. The Law of Omitted Data (i.e. if a percentage of information is omitted or missing, bad data will spread at an exponential rate over time) runs amok. This creates a vicious cycle of distrust, secrecy and dysfunction.

So yes, it can be tough ESPECIALLY in challenging times and with bad news. Take a deep breath and be as open as circumstances permit. Change the game and begin to turn vicious cycles into success cycles. This is not theory. It works. Give it a shot – suck it up and be transparent. When the results start to flow you’ll be glad you did.

No D For Managers

They say defense wins championships. As much as I enjoy employing sports analogies as a teaching tool, this is one I cannot use. Because when it comes to customer service, offense comes first. A defensive mindset is limiting and ultimately self-defeating.

Generally unhappy people are everywhere, so the odds that some of them live in a community you serve are pretty good. Whether or not their beef is legitimate, or whether or not it has anything to do with you personally, it may well feel personal. And some particularly miserable folks will take great pains to make it so. In these situations, defensiveness feels natural. In very negative environments, it might even feel necessary for self-preservation. It can be a challenge to avoid the trap of defaulting to playing defense in your interactions with owners and residents.

SILLY HUMAN TRICKS

People unconsciously live up or down to expectation. So when you set a defensive tone, people are more likely to be contrary. They also mirror, that is, reflect the emotions and behavior of those with whom they interact. That means (1) as a professional problem solver, people bring you problems. They may not be happy about that problem and their negativity will rub off on you unless you are very careful. And (2) if you are negative, they are more likely to be negative. Think about it… are you are one of those managers who complains regularly about your job? Are you creating a space where negative transactions are likely, maybe even inevitable? Oops.

A word about “CYA” (covering your…butt). Some old school, burned out managers will tell you that CYA is the first rule of management. It might be the first rule of mediocre management, but not good management. CYA is the sure byproduct of doing good business. The follow up email, the contemporaneous business record, the documentation of conditions, inspection reports, thorough board packages – these are all fundamental business practices that protect both you and the association. But when your first goal is CYA, you get selfish. You do things that clearly protect you, but are frequently short sighted and have little to do with addressing the real issues of the day. A mindset of self-protectionism can create a vicious cycle of ineffectiveness that leads to distrust. Constant defense becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

“But Tom, we live in a litigious society. And my Board questions every move I make. I have to play defense all the time!”

You are right. But your strategy is flawed.

IN CUSTOMER SERVICE, A GOOD OFFENSE IS THE BEST DEFENSE

Great managers play offense by taking a proactive, positive approach to their work. They don’t wait for problems to come, they look for opportunities to address things before they become problems. When problems do come to them, they see the opportunities hidden within.

When you take the initiative to play offense first, you free your mind to see the possibilities. You recognize the potential for good in people and help them to be their best selves. You build trust. You find you don’t have to play defense so often. Your reputation creates space for good things to happen. And you put yourself in a position to love what you do.

How Great Managers Play Offense

• Think solutions and work towards them, even if you can’t give your client exactly what they want. Or anything approaching what they want for that matter. Be that person who gets things done despite challenges.
• If a statement needs correction, do it in the third sentence, not the first.
• Focus on the principles behind the matter at hand. Teach. Help others to raise their thinking.
• Don’t mirror the negative, problem-based mindset of others. Let them mirror your positive, solutions-based approach.
• Paint a picture of possibility and a bigger perspective.
• And yes, document, document, document. It’s just good business.