Monthly Archives: February 2019

change management, community associations, condo associations, Cooperatives, Culture, HOAs, leadership

Just Don’t

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Silly Human Tricks

We work/live/hang around with certain people for a while. We have experiences with them. We get to know them. We disagree on a few things. We begin to get annoyed with them. We draw conclusions about their motives. We remember the disagreements.

Here’s where it gets weird.

We strategize to get the results we want, with assumptions about evil intent and ugly history close in our mind and heart. We overstate. We accuse. We blame. They are doing the same thing with us. The disagreements deepen. On the surface, conflicts appear to be about the matter at hand. But just under the water line, the real conflict lurks. We are simultaneously talking about the issues of the day and the distrust of the past. These bi-level communications can last forever. Things bog down. Nothing gets done. History repeats again and again in the vortex of a vicious failure cycle. Dysfunction reigns supreme.

Sound familiar? Congress, anyone?

The pattern can set in with any organization where we silly humans are involved. The more emotionally or physically close the people and the longer the relationship, the more entrenched the pattern. I’ve seen it happen in social circles, in businesses, in families, and yes… in community associations.

Learning How to Break the Cycle

Breaking the failure cycle is not easy, but it’s achievable in most circumstances. It took me a while to appreciate the uniqueness of my career in the community associations field. Since my first on-site management contract, my main, though unstated, role had been to fix broken things and build trust. In the ensuing years, I was thrust into similarly challenging situations. I’m not complaining. The experience turned out to be the best education I could have gotten. It led to me doing most of the consulting for a management company and the formation of Association Bridge.

Here’s what I learned…

Don’t Let the 5 Percenters Rule the Roost

One of our silly human tricks is to focus on the negative. 95% of things might be working well, but we only focus on the 5% of that which makes us unhappy or divides us. Community association leaders and managers will always spend a significant amount of time fixing problems. It’s a big part of their jobs. But that can create a challenge. A constant focus on the 5% makes it hard to see the other 95.

I learned a secret. There is a reason people decide to move into a particular community. There are shared goals, values, and aspirations there. I’ve never worked with a community where its members didn’t have more in common than that which divided them. They just couldn’t see it at first. They were so into the weeds that they could not see the forest. The weeds are where the 5 percenters live and flourish. And yes, that includes those with wildly diverse demographics.

The problems are real. Different opinions are real. But the bigger picture is just as real. Getting out of the weeds of distrust and dysfunction requires elevation.

Get to Higher Ground

There are a few strategies that can help to elevate the discourse and begin to turn failure cycles into success cycles. Here are three of my favorites:

  • Use Affirmative Inquiry:  Identify that which members have in common. Establish shared values and goals. Then apply those to the 5 Percenters. Seeing the bigger picture helps to set a context and changes the game.  
  • Let Data Drive the Discussion: Much conflict comes from what I call “Theoryworld.” Absent reliable data, people will always rely on what they know – their opinions. Do the homework, communicate the data vigorously, and let that drive the discussion.   
  • Fresh Blood: Sometimes new leaders with a fresh perspective can help groups come together. In other cases, a “disinterested third party,” a facilitator with no dog in the fight, can help bridge the gaps.

Trust is almost always the key. Stephen M.R. Covey made an astute observation in his excellent book The Speed of Trust. When trust is present, things happen quickly and cost-effectively. When trust is absent, things take longer and cost more. Who doesn’t want cheap and easy? Getting to higher ground begins the process of melting distrust and creating a culture of trust.

Yeah, Sounds Great, But….

Does this stuff actually work? Here are some real-life examples of “Breaking the Cycle”:

Case Study #1

One association had an incendiary newsletter that torched the board over every decision. They undermined confidence and deepened divisions in the community. After about a month, I realized that its editor was a board member’s wife.

I expanded my “Board Orientation/Tune Up” program into a two-part community leadership program. The community had several committees, including the newsletter committee, which were contributing to the dysfunction to one degree or another. The first session was for all committee members and board members. This was followed a week later by a board-only session. There was a clear communication of both the letter and spirit of the law and governing documents. Both sessions included a section about best practices in leadership. We applied universally accepted principles to the community association paradigm. This created a space where the group could follow up with a productive planning session. They were able to agree on goals for the year and a program to reach them. Two years of progress ensued.

Case Study #2

Another condominium we took over had severely underfunded reserves and an unrealistic budget. They had also been the victim of theft from their prior attorney, who had pocketed the fees provided by members in collections. The stories were heartbreaking. Community members were equally upset about the condition of the property and the prospect of higher condominium fees. I facilitated a town hall meeting to share the difficult news. The Board, worried about a violent reaction, made sure to hire an off-duty police officer to keep me and them from being attacked.

By the end of the presentation with the data clearly shared, we had unit owners offering to organize to perform some repairs and property clean-up as volunteers. Once members saw clearly the reality of their situation, working together to find solutions became the obvious alternative to blame and complaint. Despite the increase in fees and many challenges, there was a palpable improvement in community spirit at the next annual meeting.

Case Study #3

At an annual meeting 16 days into a new management contract, I had a unit owner point her finger at me and tell me she was going to hold me accountable for everything the board did. In the ensuing months, she took full advantage of owner comment periods at board meetings to remind everyone of every bad decision that had been made over the last 30 years and to call into question board members’ intelligence. I got to know her and at one point suggested she consider running for the board to be a part of the solution. She declined. I still remember the look on her face when I told her that at some point the community would need to learn how to agree to disagree in an agreeable fashion. You would have thought I had two heads. After a pregnant pause, she whirled away and exclaimed disgustedly, “That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard!”

After a full analysis of the operation and a particularly vigorous and expanded budget process, the community understood the needs of the building and where their money was going. At the next annual meeting, my finger-pointing friend rose to deliver her usual diatribe, only to be encouraged to cease and desist by her fellow unit owners. Deferred maintenance projects were eventually initiated. The turnaround put this previously notorious community in a position to win a Community Association of the Year award.

The Bottom Line

We spend too much time and energy allowing our opinions get in the way of getting things done. We are missing opportunities that are right in front of us. Imputing the motives of others has no value. Even if you are right, it doesn’t help.

Stop. Just don’t. Find facts and stick with them. Get to higher ground. Focus on strengths. Find the shared values, goals and aspirations. Let that create context and culture. Put people in a position to be their best. And then…watch success happen.

The iconic Sgt. Joe Friday had the right idea…

business life, Time Management

Time Management Tip #1 – Do You Think It OR Do You Feel It?

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The next time you hear yourself saying “I don’t have time!” pay close attention. We all have the same 24 hours each day. You have the time. It would be more accurate to say that you are choosing to use your time to do something else.

Granted, that choice may have been made for you. It might be a deadline. Perhaps an emergency has raised its ugly head and thrown your best-laid plans into the circular file. In other cases, it’s the juggling of day to day activities. For certain, you’ll never be able to do everything you could do. Your success (and your sanity) will lie in the ability to do everything you must do, and then doing what you should do. Your challenge isn’t unmanageable time. It’s managing your priorities and somehow aligning your actions to meet them.

Stop, Drop and Roll

When the day catches fire, you have to stop and put it out. Failure to do so will only feed the flames and you’ll be toast soon enough. You may say you don’t have time to grab the extinguisher, but that might not be your brain talking. You cannot ignore the emotional side of decision-making and time management. A wise man said many centuries ago, “The heart is more treacherous than anything else and is desperate, who can know it?” Going with your gut has its place. But in times of stress, it’s a good idea to make sure the old noggin is fully engaged. How can you do it?

  • Start the day in a quiet place, where you can think clearly and make good decisions. Create a prioritized task list (NOT a “to do” list).   You’ll have a clue as to what’s most important and have a legitimate shot at getting at least some of it done. It creates context and a basis for decisions during the day.
  • Plan breaks. Jim Fannin recommends quarters, like a football game. Plan time to disengage mentally and emotionally, even if only for a few moments. Then analyze how things are going. You plan might have imploded by 10AM. Adjust as needed. Take a deep breath and dive in.
  • If you need to make a few calls or send some emails to reschedule and manage expectations, do it. Fight the urge for procrastination or conflict avoidance. You might make someone upset, but how much angrier would they be if you don’t deliver and say nothing? It might work out better than you imagine!

Counterintuitive or Fearful?

It might seem counterintuitive to take a break when you already have too much to do. But you will find your focus and productivity will go way up. Daniel Pink’s latest book When – The Scientific Secrets of Perfect Timing   and Jim Fannin’s 90-Second Rule  are full of great techniques and exercises that can help.

To a large degree, you are managing your energy and attention, not your time. Those breaks become time investments.  When you get your focus and productivity boost, you will find that you will get back far more time than you spent. 

People under stress tend to make bad decisions. It’s not that they aren’t smart enough. Fear and anxiety goof up the decision making process. Don’t let your heart scare you into thinking you don’t have time. Deal with the emotional side first and then let your brain do its thing. Your heart will thank you later!

Best Practices, community associations, Governance, leadership, Meeting Tips

Meeting Tips #5 – Little Things Set a Tone & Help You Get Stuff Done (Part Deux)

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“Excellence is doing ordinary things extraordinarily well.” – John W. Gardner

Nip It in the Bud

One negative person can dominate the tone of a whole room. A proactive approach can be an effective strategy to keep things positive and productive. Arrive early. Before the meeting starts, read body language and other non-verbal cues. Look for members who may have expressed negativity in the past, or those you know have a complaint they want to bring up. It might feel natural to duck and cover, waiting for the meeting to start. To defeat fear of conflict, try approaching the person with a friendly greeting. You might be amazed. Short, personal, respectful and positive interchanges can be a game changer. The person might just tell you what’s on their mind and you will be able to have a productive interchange even before the meeting starts. Taking the initiative in showing respect and civility makes it easier for people, even the unhappy ones, to be at their best and respond in kind. It won’t always work. But if you don’t try it, it definitely won’t work.

Bob’s Got a Point

Some people chafe at the thought of using Robert’s Rules. It might seem overly formal. Some chairpersons seem to use it as a sledgehammer to control people, further giving Ol’ Bob a bad name.

While it makes no sense to employ every detail and nuance included in Robert’s to a small group, there is one process that can make a world of difference. When a board sticks with the basic discipline of making motions, it can save a ton of time and make sure the discussion stays civil and on point. It also emphasizes two key principles that are essential for group decision-making. The will of the majority is done and the minority is heard and has the opportunity to impact the final decision. Too many boards talk their way into a motion and try to get everybody on the same page. I remember one board president, who was a professional grant writer and part-time poet, who wordsmithed every motion on the spot. Approving minutes with an edit could take 20 minutes! Here’s the process that negates talking your way into a motion and the endless and inefficient chatter that goes with it:

  1. Make a specific motion. A board member would like to approve an action.
  2. Second the motion. Another board member agrees the thing is worth considering. If there is no second, there is nothing to talk about. The motion dies. That’s it. Stop talking.
  3. Chair calls for discussion. Only now is discussion initiated, and it is focused on the merits of the motion. Questions are asked and answered. MAYBE a better idea comes up – and if so, the original motion can be amended. If it’s clear the motion seems fatally flawed, it can be withdrawn and replaced by a completely new motion – or not.
  4. Call the question. Once it becomes clear to the chair or other board members that the points have been made, it’s time to vote. If someone objects to calling the question, they should have a brand new point to make.
  5. Vote. A 5-0 vote has the same effect of a 3-2 vote. If board members are respectful and gracious…i.e. good fiduciaries and leaders… the minority will support the decision and set a tone for the community.
  6. Next!

If your meetings are chaotic and directions unclear, give it a try. You might be surprised.

And Finally…

I’ve had a mentor for over 30 years. One of the reasons I’ve stuck with him all these years is “Best Idea Wins” has always been his motto. He stays faithful to the principle, no matter how challenging the people and circumstances have been.

Think about it… a good idea is a good idea. It doesn’t matter who comes up with it. It doesn’t matter how well or poorly the idea might be communicated. Ideas have no ego. Ideas lead to solutions. Committing to Best Idea Wins demonstrates principled leadership, especially when things get complicated and contentious. It creates a space where people can resolve conflicts and be at their best. Try it. You will inspire the same respect that I have for my mentor.

To all the board members and professionals who serve them, I offer this encouragement. Please never forget that when you choose to carry out your responsibilities in an excellent way, you absolutely make a difference in the quality of life of everyone in the communities you serve, sometimes in large ways, sometimes in small ways, whether or not members realize it or not, and whether or not they ever say “thank you.” The only person who can take that truth away from you is you. Please don’t let that happen

So there you have it. Thirty years of meetings boiled down to twenty-six tips over five blogs. Have you found any that work for you that we missed? Let us know!

Best Practices, community associations, Meeting Tips

Meeting Tips #4 – Little Things Set a Tone & Help You Get Stuff Done

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“Great things are not done by impulse, but by a series of small things brought together.” – George Eliot

Excellence does not come about by accident. Nor is it typically the result of heroic leaps and bounds. It is usually the accumulation of incremental actions, the compounded interest earned from habits applied to what might seem to be insignificant details. Exceptionally productive meetings are no different. They don’t happen by accident. And there are several little things that can make a big difference.

Association board members are fiduciaries. The principle applies equally to large associations with multi-million dollar budgets and a 20-home HOA. Board members are taking care of other people’s stuff. That’s serious. It’s important to do good business at meetings.

Room Logistics Make a Difference

It can be a challenge to stay sharp when you are meeting in someone’s living room. This can be a challenge for communities without appropriate meeting space on site, or without easy distance of a local school, library, fire hall, or other suitable locations. The manager of one upscale condominium association told me of a client who had to aggressively recommend that they cease serving wine before meetings in the board president’s unit. The indecipherable minutes helped to make the case for her. I doubt the wine would have been an issue if the meeting wasn’t held in someone’s living room!

Once a suitable space has been identified, room setup helps to set a tone. Tables set in a “V” or “U” configuration help board members to communicate effectively. It also helps attendees to understand that it’s the board’s business meeting, not a community chat. Consider the audience. In the case of one client who holds their meetings in a very pleasant community room, I realized the location of the couches and chairs led to attendees sitting at the back of the room. Some had to turn their heads to see the board. After the first meeting, we re-arranged the furniture to bring the audience closer to the front of the room, which made it easier to follow the meeting. It looked less like a living room and more like a meeting hall, with as much of the seating faced towards the board. They still got to sit in comfy furniture, but left the meeting without cricks in their necks! This, along with adjusting the board’s seating arrangements, helped to completely change the tone of the meetings.

Members Are Important!

While the room configuration helps to establish a businesslike tone, it doesn’t need to be inhospitable for the members who have dedicated their valuable time to get involved in the community – an effort that should not go unappreciated.

One exceptional client from my management days makes a habit of asking if the meeting is the first for any attendees, whether they are new move-ins or not. They are invited to introduce themselves, and the board welcomes them warmly and introduces themselves and the management team in the front of the room. It’s an excellent way to set a tone for the meeting.

Taking the time to explain the Why to members during meetings is a small thing that helps everyone. This is where situational awareness  becomes very useful. If the chair is aware of the audience and can read the room, she may pick up on disconnects and side comments. Other board members should stay engaged as well to assist and support the chair.

If someone doesn’t know why the board doesn’t allow comments from the floor throughout the meeting, find an opportune time to explain why in positive terms. Avoid emphasizing what they can’t do – help them to see how they can provide input and ask questions. Is there a hot topic on the agenda and an unusually large crowd chomping at the bit to participate in the open forum portion of the meeting? Remember some of them may be first time attendees who don’t understand the structure of the meeting. It pays to walk the group through the process up front, highlighting that time limits or other meeting management systems are in place to make sure everyone can be heard. Avoid the natural tendency for defensiveness. Embrace the dialogue. Look for opportunities to educate and communicate shared values.

Goals

All these little things can help create a space where the board can do the business of the association more effectively. It won’t always work. These days, civility and respect seem to be in increasingly short supply. In a world that seems determined to create Us vs. Them paradigms, leaders have a challenge. In reality, there is no Them. There is only Us. It is vitally important for board members to embody and promote these values. The last blog in this series will explore some final tips to help. Stay tuned!